Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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