You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'm determined to sit on that face.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
