yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize