I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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