That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Randomize
