Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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