What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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