The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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