your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
smell my finger.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
