I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
