There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
