im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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