We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Randomize
