Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
