Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
