No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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