i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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