Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
