you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
