Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
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I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
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