You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Randomize
