We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize