Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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