honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize