I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
This is classic penis vs brain.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
