I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
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