Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
