Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
True strength comes from lack of pants
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
