I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
