And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize