Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
