now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Sorry about my life...
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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