I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
