Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
