Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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