last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
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Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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