Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
