remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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