If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
