she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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