I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
