Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
