ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
People in love make me want to vomit
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
The Olympian is in my bed
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
