Nicole vs. Life
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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