Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize