I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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