I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
