Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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