hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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