I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
