Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
