the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
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I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
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I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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