Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
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Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
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You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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